The Pilgrim’s Protest

By Sarah Nixon

“When Sinners Say I Do” is a beautiful look at marriage, love, and relationships in a fallen world. As the title suggests, this book talks a lot about sin; however the author, Pastor Dave Harvey, writes not to glorify sin, but instead to glorify the gospel. Where he talks about sin, the truth of grace immediately follows. He writes “when sin becomes bitter, marriage becomes sweet”, and so he emphasizes sin to promote God-glorifying marriage built on the foundational truth of the gospel
The book begins with the question of how marriage works. Harvey’s answer? What we believe about God determines whether or not our marriages will work. He goes on to talk about the importance of having a “spouse-theologian”, one who will live out the gospel daily in the road of marriage. From that point at the beginning of the book to the end, Harvey shows how we will learn to be better spouses as God’s love infiltrates our lives.
Harvey’s stirring stories of marriage and love and beautiful quotes are woven together with his smooth writing style and humorous approach. He writes with clarity and honesty, both of which are lacking in many marriage books today. Harvey does not give 10 simple steps to a happy marriage, but instead gives biblical principles on how live in marriage as a sinner saved by grace. His emphasis on mercy, compassion, wisdom, and “stubborn grace” are things a Christian can apply to all relationships. Because of that, this is a book worth reading even for those who are not only unmarried, but those who aren’t even in a romantic relationship. Sin doesn’t start as soon as you get married—it will affect every relationship you will ever have. Harvey’s points can be useful in any close relationship but are especially applicable in the “pressure-cooker” of marriage.
Life as Christians is lived in the tension between sin and grace, our selfishness and our sanctification. This book does a beautiful job of pointing out how that tension plays itself out in the realm of marriage, and how if we let it, God’s grace can cover our sins.